John Finn Jr and Bing (Verna) Lamigo - Married Nov 2018
John: I was baptized in 1992 and had been in a couple relationships that just did not work out. After my previous relationship not working out I decided to stop looking for a sister to go steady with and just go on dates with sisters for the purpose of affirming to them that they are loved and appreciated and worth building friendships with.
A few years later I was encouraged to sign up for DT Heart & Soul, so I did. I wasn’t going to overwhelm any sister by bombarding her with emails. On the flip side, I was not going to deny any sister on DTHS friendship for any reason at all; I was not going to neglect any sister. When they sent me an email, I would send one back, instead of making them wait. I see that as sound advice for both brothers and sisters
I did friend many sisters and started emailing these sisters as well as friending them on Facebook also, where we could get to know each other at a faster pace than just one email at a time. Again, it was friendship first. Make a note, singles: If you ask the marrieds in your church who their best friend is, almost certainly they will say it is their spouse, and if you have not built a friendship with somebody you want to go steady with or marry, you will be saying “What happened?” when that relationship falls apart.
How did we meet? It seems that one of the sisters I was building a long distance friendship with had a friend (My future wife Bing) who was encouraging me to get to know that sister. We kept in contact with each other and ended up building a friendship. She was so smart and spiritual; humble and selfless; encouraging and compassionate, and so much more. She had a great sense of humor too. After knowing her a couple months, I thought “Wow, this sister is so encouraging. She always says the right thing. I wonder what she looks like”. I don’t judge people or have an interest in sisters because of their outside appearance, but by their heart. Looks will always fade, but an awesome heart can last forever. At that point I decided to look at her Facebook photo album to see what she looked like, and I was stunned by how beautiful she is.
As our relationship grew closer, I was a little hesitant to go any farther in our relationship. My previous relationship about five years earlier had left me a little fearful of building another relationship with another sister. I asked Bing to be patient. When I finally felt comfortable of moving forward, I had my evangelist get in touch with her evangelist, just to make sure that she was a sister of good standing. Since Bing was no longer a part of DT Heart Soul, I did not really know about her church affiliation. I also talked to her best friends. Eventually, I decided to go and visit her. I made myself a promise that I would not ask her to go steady unless I was fully sold out for her. I was going to be there for 17 days so I could be there on both Valentine’s Day and her birthday.
By the time her birthday came around, I was stunned by how much effort she had made for me, even before I had arrived. I was sold out for her, because she was sold out for me, and I thought “I definitely have to ask her to go steady”. I spent some time with her evangelist and asked her a couple days later, on her birthday. Once we were a steady dating couple, we started Skyping to get to know each other, and by the following Thanksgiving (Late November), I asked her to marry me.
Many months later she flew here, and a month later we were married in a place where I had wanted to get married at for decades, a place I consider the most beautiful spot in Massachusetts. We have been very happy since. As I told somebody “I would rather have waited this long to marry Bing, than marry somebody else at a younger age. She was definitely worth the wait”.
Thanks God and thanks DT Heart and Soul for bringing us together from opposite sides of the planet to marry each other. We are forever grateful.
